The Art of Pleasuring – Variation

Photo by Conscious Design on Unsplash

Variation is a key element in the art of pleasuring. When we receive the same type of stimulation for a long time, the brain tunes it out. We stop hearing the dripping faucet, for instance. Try this experiment for yourself, right now. Rub the palm of your hand with one finger in the same line, back and forth. Keep doing this for a while. Notice your sensations. Now change the direction of the line. Notice the sensation now. Did you feel it more once you changed direction?

Variation can come from changes in pressure (light or firm), in speed (slow or fast), the place you are touching, the length of the stroke, or the direction of the stroke. Touch can move on a continuum from very yin (soft, slow) to very yang (hard, fast). Very yin touch might be using your breath on the skin, or brushing the hairs without touching the skin. Very yang could be grabbing firmly, biting, or spanking. And there’s a wonderful range in between. Of course, a stroke can combine elements of both yin and yang, for example a light and fast stroke. There’s a playground to explore in these variations, moving from yin to yang and places in between.

Generally, it is best to start with more yin touch, to allow the body to warm up. Save the more yang touch for when energy is moving and your partner is more aroused. They will be much more likely to enjoy it then. Otherwise, you might be met with an “Ouch!”

You can have a lot of fun exploring the ranges of variation!

Published by Satya Lila

I help couples who are getting a little older discover a sexual renaissance and find ways of relating sexually that lead to even better levels of bliss.

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