Self and Others

Sunday is the full moon. The sun is in Aries and the moon is in Libra. What does this mean for you and your relationship?

Any full moon has an inherent opposition of energies. Full moons happen when the sun and moon are opposite each other, with the earth in between. The energies are at opposite ends of a spectrum. What that spectrum is changes from month to month.

Aries is the sign that is most about the self, and Libra is the sign that is most about partnership. Can you sense the tug-of-war that is embedded in that?

Most people have a predominant inclination of emphasis. Some are self-centered. Some are other-centered. Neither is bad; in fact, both are necessary for a balanced way of being.

A self-centered person is good at taking care of themselves, but maybe not so good at paying attention to what their partner needs. An other-centered person is just the opposite. They focus upon their partner’s needs, and often neglect themself.

Those are the extreme ends of the spectrum. Most people are somewhere in between, where it’s healthier.

Ideally, we each take care of ourselves so well that we overflow with well-being to give to our partner. Of course, this will vary from day to day. Some day you need a helping hand. Other days, you need to self-nourish.

I invite you to use the energies of this full moon to pay attention to this dichotomy. Where are you on this spectrum? Self-centered? Other-centered? This would be an excellent time to try out the opposite end of the spectrum.

If you are predominately self-centered, gift your partner with service. Offer them a day or an afternoon where you are at their pleasure. They can ask for whatever they like, and you give it to them in the spirit of service, with no expectations and no strings attached.

If you are more other-centered, take a period of time for yourself. Go inward, ask yourself what would YOU like in this time. A bath? Stretching your body? Self-pleasuring? A walk? Approach this time as if you have a date with someone very special — you!

In either case, notice what comes up for you. Is it uncomfortable? Unfamiliar? A relief? Whatever you notice, stay out of judgment about it. Let this be just information that might guide you into an adjustment in your orientation.

Happy full moon!

Published by Satya Lila

I help couples who are getting a little older discover a sexual renaissance and find ways of relating sexually that lead to even better levels of bliss.

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